Hello blog land!
I promised princess Di a vacation blog and have not delivered. My free internet is up in a few hours as we transfer from the Disney Beach Club Villas to the Disney Magic so I thought I’d try to get something out now while I had more time!
Friday (Sept 19) I ended up taking the day off work because of the flooding which had closed my parking lot. There was another lot WAY across town (and the river) I COULD have taken…but I’d done that Thursday and decided since I was planning a half day anyway that Friday I’d just take the whole day. Elphaba and I cuddled, I ran some errands, and then by 1pm we were off to Naperville. We spend some time with mom and then I had to take her to the PetsHotel at Petsmart. None of the toys I brought for her were allowable (no internal squeakers allowed, which no one had TOLD me ahead of time), so mom and I did some looking around and picked up a few goodies and said our goodbyes. Miss E was signed up to be in doggie day camp every day from 9am-5pm, and everyone seemed to adore her (of course) and said she’d get lots of cuddle time.
Saturday we were up early as the limo was coming at 7am. We had an uneventful flight down and were at the Beach Club Villas by 3pm. Magical Express was a little slower with our luggage unfortunately. We wandered around the Yacht and Beach Clubs for a while, and then finally we gave up and I wore a dress of mom’s (who packs like a full week of clothes in her carry on) and off to dinner we went. For dinner we ate at Citricos, at the Grand Floridian. I was skeptical, but it was SOOOOOOOOOOOO good! I had, seriously, the best ribeye steak I’ve ever had in my life!
Sunday was our first day in the parks, and we selected Magic Kingdom. We didn’t have our timing worked out too well yet and were there WAY early…so we hopped on the monorial and headed to the Contemporary to shop and eat. I also found an Arial Jibbitz to replace the one that went missing out of my cotton candy colored crocs. Oh..did I mention those? The weekend before we left for vacation it was pouring rain and I threw on mom’s size 8 crocs which were WAY more comfy than my size 9 crocs. So I decided if I was bringing crocs to WDW to have water proof socks for all the rain we were supposed to get, they should be size 8s. But my store had NO size 8s in Disney themes. Or really, any size 8s in any good colors in the style I normally wear – the mary janes. So out of desperation I tried on the Cayman style (so ugly) in size 8 and they are SOOOO comfy! So I just bit the bullet and bought them…but prettied them up with some Disney jibbitz. Anyway..back to MK day….we headed to the park and it was EMPTY..seriously…we didn’t wait for anything until late in the day when we waited 25 minutes for Astro Orbiter. We had a reservation back at the Grand Floridian Garden View Lounge, for afternoon tea. Oh my goodness was that fabulous! We both got the “grand tea” and it was so relaxing and decadent feeling…but not OVERLY expensive..I think it ended up being like $60 total. After that we headed to Downtown Disney to shop a little..and walk around. I got the CUTIEST little short sleeve hoodie – covered with “cuties” which are this variation of the Disney characters that I’ve completely fallen in love with. Also – these little stuffed cutties of Mickey, Minnie, and Pluto. Then back to the hotel for an early night.
Monday we headed to Animal Kingdom. Again we were there way early, and again the park was empty. We did the Safarii, on the 3rd car so no wait! Then we headed to Expedition Everest, mom’s favorite ride. Between the empty line and the single rider line, we rode like 5 times before 9:15am that morning. At that point my head was feeling a little scrambled. Then we hit the Finding Nemo show, and Dinasaur, and decided we were done by about 11:30. We headed to lunch at Kona Café at the Polynesian. Mom was bummed because they took her favorite thing of the menu. I wasn’t overly impressed but it was okay. Then we decided to head over to Epcot early since we had a dinner reservation there that night. Like the other parks, Epcot was also empty. Though Monday the rain finally started. Not horrible, but not fun. Again – we did like everything with no wait. Then we had dinner at Teppen Edo which has been completely redone (and renamed) since my last trip to WDW. It was fabulous, and our chef was the best I’ve had at a place like that. He not only did lots of tricks but he was funny too. After dinner we wandered the World Showcase a bit more and then finally walked back to our hotel (which is just outside the International Gateway at Epcot).
Tuesday was Hollywood Studios day. Again, park was pretty empty. Mom insisted we go to Rockin Roller Coaster and Tower of Terror first, even though I’d heard you MUST got to Toy Story Mania first if you have any plans to ride it that day. Anyway, rode the roller coaster and tower of terror numerous times each and finally started heading towards Toy Story Midway Mania at 11:30. At that point, the line was 80 minutes in standby and fast passes were for 4:50pm. By noon it was OUT of fast passes for the day. We did decide to wait ONCE in standby to see the full queue theme, which was ADORABLE. But the line was SOOO slow in standby. But…Toy Story Mania is AWESOME! After that we wandered the park a bit more, and then we had 4:30 dinner reservations at Mama Melroses. I didn’t really remember, but I’d been there once before – mom never had. Food and service was fantastic. After dinner we got to use our Toy Story fast passes and ride that again, Yay! Then we headed back to the hotel to get ready for Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween Party at the Magic Kingdom. Now….MK was beautiful with the Halloween decorations, and it was kind of cool to see what they did for the party. But as empty as the parks were this week, I don’t think it was worth the price of admission to get in – we’d pretty much done everything we wanted at the MK already and just rode some stuff a few extra times. It was fun to see all the kids (and parents) in costumes, but the trick or treating wasn’t great because all the candy was seriously melted an sticky.
Wednesday we decided to take a pool day in the morning and then headed to Epcot again in the afternoon. Rode the good stuff in Future World again, then wandered the world showcase some more before dinner at Chefs de France. Food was okay, service ther was AWFUL. Seriously bad. We stayed to watch Illuninations “Reflections” which is pretty lame, and then headed back to the hotel.
Thursday we decided to do Hollywood Studios again, in the hopes of doing Toy Story again. We were there nice and early, but seriously the ENTIRE park makes a beeline for Toy Story after the gates open. In fact, the cast members direct traffic so there’s only ONE path back there. Mom got in the standby line while I got in the fast pass line. She actually got up to the building before I got up to the fast passes and had to start over. I snagged fast passes for 10:10 and got in line. That time, the queue moved quickly, probably because people didn’t have fast passes yet so everyone had to go through the regular queue. We rode the ride, went on the Back Lot tour (which is SERIOUSLY shortened from what it once was) and then went back on Toy Story. Then we hit Tower of Terror and Rockin Roller Coaster a few more times and headed back for an afternoon at the pool before dinner at the new restaurant at the Contemproary – The Wave. Wave was okay, I had the BEST citrius and avocado salad. Service was not good. We then took a bus to downtown Disney for final shopping. I picked up some decorations for the basement which I’m planning on doing a Disney theme, and a Snow White costume for Miss E (we’ll match since I have one!) and then back to the hotel.
Friday was the day we were probably anticipating most – our Around the World tour at Epcot on Segways. Ever since we did the Segway tour in Chicago in July, mom and I have both been anxious to get back on another Segway. Though the Segways were fun as we remembered, and it was cool to get into the World Showcase while it was still closed, and cool to see the last minute prep for the Food and Wine festival which started that day, overall we had much more fun in Chicago. Disney has the Segways there governed at 6 mph…substantially less than the 10-11 we got to do in Chicago. And we weren’t really allowed to zip around much. Plus, the tour itself was only like an hour – the first hour was training. We decided Disney needs to have a certification class for Segways for guests (they do certified cast members who zip all over on them) and then set up some more advanced tours. After the tour, we walked around the world to check out the Food and Wine offerings. Originally, we didn’t schedule dinner anywhere for that day and planned to eat around the world for dinner. But a quick glance at the offerings and we both knew I would not be eating. So we scrambled and picked up a dinner reservation at the Yachtsmen Steakhouse, and old favorite of mine. We headed back to the hotel to do laundry in prep of week 2. Spent the afternoon doing that and laying at the pool. Then off to dinner, which was not nearly as good as our Saturday night dinner at Citricos. After dinner we walked the loop around the Epcot resorts visiting Swan, Dolphin, and Boardwalk. We picked up cupcakes at the Boardwalk to bring back with us, and checked out the premier of Grey’s Anatomy thanks to free internet for Disney Vacation Club guests, and my Macbook.
Saturday was lazy since we had to get the bus to port at 11:30am .We had brunch and laid around the room reading and watching part two of the Grey’s premier. Then off to port we went!
I’m on board now, and internet is expensive – I have to strategically plan to buy a package giving me JUST enough minutes for what I’ll need for class which starts up again Wednesday. But more to come on our week on the Magic!
Monday, September 29, 2008
Thursday, August 07, 2008
Update on closing on for the new house...
Okay..so when the saga last left off..I was in the middle of trying to figure out how the HELL I was gonna close on the new house.
My realtor called the title company and then called me back almost right away last night. They asked if we could get the check from HSBC overnighted straight to the Title company. I shared that I made that request, but 1) the dude on the phone made it sound like no way in hell would that happen, and 2) I was skeptical they'd get a check mailed out at ALL on time since I got a "well respond to your request within 48 hours" notice. We hang up for her to call the title company back. Meanwhile, I made a desperate plea....
Now..most of you don't really know much about my parents.but basically..dad is well off, but we don't have a good relationship..and I take nothing from him. Mom on the other hand...got the shaft when the split, no college degree, and struggles to make it thru. I was prepping to call dad...out of sheer desperation...but thought I'd call mom first.
Me: I know you are still at work but I have a crisis and I don't know what else to do right now.
Mom: Actually, not at work, whats going on.
Me: I think I know the answer to this, but I have to ask anyway. Any chance you can pull together $XXXX in a cashiers check by Sunday, to take with you when you go to meet the realtor for my walk thru, and I can pay you back by midweek next week.
Mom: (pauses). Actually, yeah I think so..let me check my bank balance. Whats going on?
I proceed to start telling mom about the HSBC nightmare...while I'm in process..she says yes, she'll have to shift stuff out of a couple of accounts but she has the money.
HALLELUAH!
How on earth my mom has that much in savings..I don't know. Well I do..after the last time she lost her job she finally started working on her emergency account that I'd been hounding her about. And unlike my stupid emergency account, which is where my cash to close was also sitting, its at her regular bank and she can go get it!
While I'm on the phone with mom, realtor calls back..they spoke to the sellers, they don't need the money right away, so they're okay with us doing a "dry run" closing on Monday where all the papers get signed but no money, nor possession of the house, goes right away..they can wait until I can get the money moved. I tell her thats great, but that miracle of miracle..mom has the cash and is it okay for mom to bring her the check on Sunday when they meet and she can take it to closing. My sweet realtor "Bless your mothers heart". My sentiments EXACTLY!
So I call mom back and tell her to get in the car (its nearing 5pm) and go to the bank. Give her the needed info. She goes. I start thinking about...what happens if HSBC DOES get my stupid bankmail, and now initiates this check..and does do what I don't think they could..which is make it out to the title company and send it directly...the title company doesn't need that money anymore..and if its not made out to me its not like I can cash it. But again...I can't CALL anyone about my account..bankmail is my only option. So I send another one, saying
"please disgregard my note of 1 hour ago. I've made alternative arrangements. Also, please let me know what steps I need to take to close out this account. Its become clear that this account at this bank is not meeting my needs". Still waiting for a response to either of those.
Mom calls back..she's at the bank, its 4:57pm. They close at 5pm. Except...they have locked the doors and won't let her in, nor even confirm she can get the check! Now..we don't expect there to be a problem..but given how this is gone..well..you can understand my concerns. Mom's going to call today to try and talk to someone, and won't be able to get to the bank again until Friday when they are open a little later...but again..we don't expect that to be an issue.
Meanwhile..I keep stressing about what happens if HSBC tries to send this check now..which I don't want them to do. It occurs to me..start transfering the money..enough so that they CANNOT issue the check because there's not enough money in the account to issue it. Then..if they don't see both bankmails - including the one to cancel it - they'll see there is insufficent funds..and then maybe call or look at my bankmails. So...I started that last night..and the funds are already on the way to my WF account...for which they'll arrive Monday..same day mom should get a check from me..so she's only out the money 2 days.
Mom points out... "you've had a lot of bank related problems since you first moved from IL to CA"...I realize she's right. And I still have my credit union account in IL tho its not been used in years. So....once everything else gets settled down..I'll move the rest of the money from HSBC to my credit union account..then eventually when the PA home is sold, get all my other money out of WF and into my credit union account...and go back to banking with the credit union for my company that I've never had an issue with!!!!!
My realtor called the title company and then called me back almost right away last night. They asked if we could get the check from HSBC overnighted straight to the Title company. I shared that I made that request, but 1) the dude on the phone made it sound like no way in hell would that happen, and 2) I was skeptical they'd get a check mailed out at ALL on time since I got a "well respond to your request within 48 hours" notice. We hang up for her to call the title company back. Meanwhile, I made a desperate plea....
Now..most of you don't really know much about my parents.but basically..dad is well off, but we don't have a good relationship..and I take nothing from him. Mom on the other hand...got the shaft when the split, no college degree, and struggles to make it thru. I was prepping to call dad...out of sheer desperation...but thought I'd call mom first.
Me: I know you are still at work but I have a crisis and I don't know what else to do right now.
Mom: Actually, not at work, whats going on.
Me: I think I know the answer to this, but I have to ask anyway. Any chance you can pull together $XXXX in a cashiers check by Sunday, to take with you when you go to meet the realtor for my walk thru, and I can pay you back by midweek next week.
Mom: (pauses). Actually, yeah I think so..let me check my bank balance. Whats going on?
I proceed to start telling mom about the HSBC nightmare...while I'm in process..she says yes, she'll have to shift stuff out of a couple of accounts but she has the money.
HALLELUAH!
How on earth my mom has that much in savings..I don't know. Well I do..after the last time she lost her job she finally started working on her emergency account that I'd been hounding her about. And unlike my stupid emergency account, which is where my cash to close was also sitting, its at her regular bank and she can go get it!
While I'm on the phone with mom, realtor calls back..they spoke to the sellers, they don't need the money right away, so they're okay with us doing a "dry run" closing on Monday where all the papers get signed but no money, nor possession of the house, goes right away..they can wait until I can get the money moved. I tell her thats great, but that miracle of miracle..mom has the cash and is it okay for mom to bring her the check on Sunday when they meet and she can take it to closing. My sweet realtor "Bless your mothers heart". My sentiments EXACTLY!
So I call mom back and tell her to get in the car (its nearing 5pm) and go to the bank. Give her the needed info. She goes. I start thinking about...what happens if HSBC DOES get my stupid bankmail, and now initiates this check..and does do what I don't think they could..which is make it out to the title company and send it directly...the title company doesn't need that money anymore..and if its not made out to me its not like I can cash it. But again...I can't CALL anyone about my account..bankmail is my only option. So I send another one, saying
"please disgregard my note of 1 hour ago. I've made alternative arrangements. Also, please let me know what steps I need to take to close out this account. Its become clear that this account at this bank is not meeting my needs". Still waiting for a response to either of those.
Mom calls back..she's at the bank, its 4:57pm. They close at 5pm. Except...they have locked the doors and won't let her in, nor even confirm she can get the check! Now..we don't expect there to be a problem..but given how this is gone..well..you can understand my concerns. Mom's going to call today to try and talk to someone, and won't be able to get to the bank again until Friday when they are open a little later...but again..we don't expect that to be an issue.
Meanwhile..I keep stressing about what happens if HSBC tries to send this check now..which I don't want them to do. It occurs to me..start transfering the money..enough so that they CANNOT issue the check because there's not enough money in the account to issue it. Then..if they don't see both bankmails - including the one to cancel it - they'll see there is insufficent funds..and then maybe call or look at my bankmails. So...I started that last night..and the funds are already on the way to my WF account...for which they'll arrive Monday..same day mom should get a check from me..so she's only out the money 2 days.
Mom points out... "you've had a lot of bank related problems since you first moved from IL to CA"...I realize she's right. And I still have my credit union account in IL tho its not been used in years. So....once everything else gets settled down..I'll move the rest of the money from HSBC to my credit union account..then eventually when the PA home is sold, get all my other money out of WF and into my credit union account...and go back to banking with the credit union for my company that I've never had an issue with!!!!!
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
HSBC Sucks
Okay..Monday I call HSBC to find out how to do the wire transfer. I'm told there's an automated system and to allow 24-48 hours for the wire to go through.
This morning, I call HSBC to do the wire transfer, told to use the automated system, I need the telephone access code. If I can't find that, my only option is to go directly to a branch. (and I have NO idea what this telephone access code is).
Get home, FIND the access code. Call in, actually FIND the automated system, it tells me wire transfers are not permitted with internet banking accounts. Transfers me to the third dude.
He apologizes for all the misinformation, says my ONLY option is to log onto my account and use "bankmail" ask them to overnight me a check which I'd have by Friday morning assuming they receive my mail and process it by tomorrow morning at 11am. I ask him how I know my bankmail will be received right away so that I can actually GET the check by Friday AM, and not get a "we'll reply within 48 hours type message" and he tells me there is no delay and they reply right away. I ask is there anyway I can get someone on the phone to help me and he said no. I ask if there's a customer relations number I can call, since I'm frustrated at being told 3 different things, by 3 different people and now I'm stuck not being able to access my money in time. He tells me there's only the main number, he can forward my complaint on, but that what he's telling me is correct.
So I go online to do the "bankmail" he said, requesting a check be issued to the Title Company, and sent to me to arrive here by Friday AM, or better yet, send directly to the Title Company (which dude 3 said they won't do). Guess what message I get "we'll respond in 48 hours, if you need immediate assistance call us at..." the main fucking number!
At this point, there's not enough time to get the cash back into my Wells Fargo account so that I can do the wire transfer from there... so I think I'm totally screwed.... waiting to hear back from my realtor on what we do now...but I don't know how I'm going to be able to get the money to closing on time now...
And I'm TOTALLY closing this HSBC account when this mess is over!
This morning, I call HSBC to do the wire transfer, told to use the automated system, I need the telephone access code. If I can't find that, my only option is to go directly to a branch. (and I have NO idea what this telephone access code is).
Get home, FIND the access code. Call in, actually FIND the automated system, it tells me wire transfers are not permitted with internet banking accounts. Transfers me to the third dude.
He apologizes for all the misinformation, says my ONLY option is to log onto my account and use "bankmail" ask them to overnight me a check which I'd have by Friday morning assuming they receive my mail and process it by tomorrow morning at 11am. I ask him how I know my bankmail will be received right away so that I can actually GET the check by Friday AM, and not get a "we'll reply within 48 hours type message" and he tells me there is no delay and they reply right away. I ask is there anyway I can get someone on the phone to help me and he said no. I ask if there's a customer relations number I can call, since I'm frustrated at being told 3 different things, by 3 different people and now I'm stuck not being able to access my money in time. He tells me there's only the main number, he can forward my complaint on, but that what he's telling me is correct.
So I go online to do the "bankmail" he said, requesting a check be issued to the Title Company, and sent to me to arrive here by Friday AM, or better yet, send directly to the Title Company (which dude 3 said they won't do). Guess what message I get "we'll respond in 48 hours, if you need immediate assistance call us at..." the main fucking number!
At this point, there's not enough time to get the cash back into my Wells Fargo account so that I can do the wire transfer from there... so I think I'm totally screwed.... waiting to hear back from my realtor on what we do now...but I don't know how I'm going to be able to get the money to closing on time now...
And I'm TOTALLY closing this HSBC account when this mess is over!
Monday, July 28, 2008
Crazy Drunken Pirates
So last night was the first of my going away parties...hosted by my lovely lovely ladies here. I was given NO information about the evening. I was told they'd be at my house at 3:30pm. We'd leave by 4pm. To wear casual clothes and flat shoes.
The girls start to show up and I notice everyone has a sweater or jacket. So I grab a sweater. But still I know nothing.
We get in the car and start driving towards Lancaster....I have NO idea where we are going.
We end up in Mount Joy, PA at Bube's Brewery. K tells us to go to the bar and get a drink while she "checks us in". L, D and I head to the bar, tell the hostess we just want a drink. She doesnt understand why we just want a drink and starts to ask if we're here for......L jumps in and says "no we don't want her to know why we are here". OK...what the hell is going on?
We have our drink and wander around. We're told we'll be taken for whatever is happening in the basement between 5 and 5:30. (was actually closer to 6). While we're waiting in the lobby area upstairs walks a drunken pirate asking if we've seen Bridgette. He wanders around calling after her. At nearly 6 Bridgette comes out. Apparently she's Captain Jacks' wife. Pirate and Bridgette tell us the story about how Captain Jack's baby brother was killed while the Captain was out at sea the past 6 months. Bridgette is hosting a dinner, that night and she's hoping for no bloodshed until after desert.
For those of you lost, turns out we were there for a Pirate's Feast. The group was divided up into the two ships whom one of which is responsible for the death of Captain Jack's baby brother. I won't spoil all the little details since some of you perhaps might want to go some day. What I will say...is if you are easily offended...this is NOT the event for you to go to! I was nominated "Captain" of our ship by my lovely ladies...another guest with a celebration (a 27th birthday) was nominated my First Mate. (By the way..he was a totally cutie with a smokin hot brother who sat right next to us). Anyway....drunken pirate walks up to D and asks her how much her captain (me) is worth to her and if I need a rub down. D thinks he's kidding ..but pulls out $1. Drunken pirate says now he needs just $9 more, $10 if they want to get me the "hot wax treatment". K pulls out a $5 and L pulls out a $5. Next thing I know, pirate is behind me sliding my bra straps down off my shoulders (I had a tank on) and starts giving me a massage. Once I got over the shock of it..most of it wasn't too bad. Though when you aren't really EXPECTING a massage and are in the middle of a restuarant with 25 other people in the room its a little odd. That said, the wench, Ruby, offers similar treatment to the first mate, and he gets his shirt pulled off altogether for his massage. I know little of what is actually going on at this time as pirate had pulled off my glasses when he started. After a lengthly "rub down" he tells me dinner is getting close, so he'll leave me in anticipation of the "hot wax treatment" for a while. Pirate leaves, Captain Jack comes over. FILLED with crazy sexual innuendo, and extremely touchy feely. Now...I'm not a prude by any means...but seriously..if you are the SLIGHTEST bit easily offended..or just like me had NO idea what was going on..its a bit overwhelming. Captain Jack and drunken pirate take turns showering me with highly inappropriate attention. Let me tell you...within about 40 minutes in..all of our cheeks were sore from laughing so hard. In fact, even today my cheeks still hurt!
After dinner, before desert, drunken pirate comes back and says its time for my wax treatment. He asks me if I trust L, who is sitting to my right. I tell him I do now, we'll see about tomorrow! He has me lay back across L's lap and close my eyes. Now mind you...I wore and incredible LOW cut tank..like serious boobs hanging out last night. I close my eyes...next thing I know..hot candle wax being poured ALLLLL over my chest with the pirate then breathing on it to cool it off. Now I don't know if any of you have every had any experience with hot wax....but let me tell you..its not sexy like it looks in the movies. I mean..its hot wax..it hurts like a son of a bitch! When he's done he tells me it can only be taken off with someone's lips or tongue and he's happy to oblige later if need be ( the Captain also offered his services).
Anyway...thanks to large quanties of wine, much of the other details escape me..but it was one hilarious, shocking, and highly inappropriate evening! Seriously..cheeks STILL hurt from laughing! The girls wanted to make sure my going away was memorable..and BOY was it. The guys in the office are trying to figure out how to get a hold of the girls to get pictures to use in my roast next week...I pray they don't...these are NOT the kind of pics I want out in the open!
The girls start to show up and I notice everyone has a sweater or jacket. So I grab a sweater. But still I know nothing.
We get in the car and start driving towards Lancaster....I have NO idea where we are going.
We end up in Mount Joy, PA at Bube's Brewery. K tells us to go to the bar and get a drink while she "checks us in". L, D and I head to the bar, tell the hostess we just want a drink. She doesnt understand why we just want a drink and starts to ask if we're here for......L jumps in and says "no we don't want her to know why we are here". OK...what the hell is going on?
We have our drink and wander around. We're told we'll be taken for whatever is happening in the basement between 5 and 5:30. (was actually closer to 6). While we're waiting in the lobby area upstairs walks a drunken pirate asking if we've seen Bridgette. He wanders around calling after her. At nearly 6 Bridgette comes out. Apparently she's Captain Jacks' wife. Pirate and Bridgette tell us the story about how Captain Jack's baby brother was killed while the Captain was out at sea the past 6 months. Bridgette is hosting a dinner, that night and she's hoping for no bloodshed until after desert.
For those of you lost, turns out we were there for a Pirate's Feast. The group was divided up into the two ships whom one of which is responsible for the death of Captain Jack's baby brother. I won't spoil all the little details since some of you perhaps might want to go some day. What I will say...is if you are easily offended...this is NOT the event for you to go to! I was nominated "Captain" of our ship by my lovely ladies...another guest with a celebration (a 27th birthday) was nominated my First Mate. (By the way..he was a totally cutie with a smokin hot brother who sat right next to us). Anyway....drunken pirate walks up to D and asks her how much her captain (me) is worth to her and if I need a rub down. D thinks he's kidding ..but pulls out $1. Drunken pirate says now he needs just $9 more, $10 if they want to get me the "hot wax treatment". K pulls out a $5 and L pulls out a $5. Next thing I know, pirate is behind me sliding my bra straps down off my shoulders (I had a tank on) and starts giving me a massage. Once I got over the shock of it..most of it wasn't too bad. Though when you aren't really EXPECTING a massage and are in the middle of a restuarant with 25 other people in the room its a little odd. That said, the wench, Ruby, offers similar treatment to the first mate, and he gets his shirt pulled off altogether for his massage. I know little of what is actually going on at this time as pirate had pulled off my glasses when he started. After a lengthly "rub down" he tells me dinner is getting close, so he'll leave me in anticipation of the "hot wax treatment" for a while. Pirate leaves, Captain Jack comes over. FILLED with crazy sexual innuendo, and extremely touchy feely. Now...I'm not a prude by any means...but seriously..if you are the SLIGHTEST bit easily offended..or just like me had NO idea what was going on..its a bit overwhelming. Captain Jack and drunken pirate take turns showering me with highly inappropriate attention. Let me tell you...within about 40 minutes in..all of our cheeks were sore from laughing so hard. In fact, even today my cheeks still hurt!
After dinner, before desert, drunken pirate comes back and says its time for my wax treatment. He asks me if I trust L, who is sitting to my right. I tell him I do now, we'll see about tomorrow! He has me lay back across L's lap and close my eyes. Now mind you...I wore and incredible LOW cut tank..like serious boobs hanging out last night. I close my eyes...next thing I know..hot candle wax being poured ALLLLL over my chest with the pirate then breathing on it to cool it off. Now I don't know if any of you have every had any experience with hot wax....but let me tell you..its not sexy like it looks in the movies. I mean..its hot wax..it hurts like a son of a bitch! When he's done he tells me it can only be taken off with someone's lips or tongue and he's happy to oblige later if need be ( the Captain also offered his services).
Anyway...thanks to large quanties of wine, much of the other details escape me..but it was one hilarious, shocking, and highly inappropriate evening! Seriously..cheeks STILL hurt from laughing! The girls wanted to make sure my going away was memorable..and BOY was it. The guys in the office are trying to figure out how to get a hold of the girls to get pictures to use in my roast next week...I pray they don't...these are NOT the kind of pics I want out in the open!
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
For the first time, horribly dissapointed by Apple
This Mobile Me transition has been a nightmare...first no more access to webmail since you have to have Firefox or Safari (or IE7 for SOME basic features) and like most of corporate america I'm stuck on IE6 with NO way to upgrade or install anything else. THEN MobileMe mail goes down altogether.... 5 days now... no end in sight....after trying all day finally got through to chat support tonight...but there was no point..
Transcript below..but bottom line...if you write me at my mac.com address normally...update your address books...write me at the same screen name on aol.com instead.
essica H: Hello Shelley. Thank you for your patience while waiting. What MobileMe billing, mail, or syncing issue can I assist you with today?
Shelley : I've not received any mail on my mobile mail account since last Friday. I would like to know when this issue is going to be resolved since the web site as said "ASAP" since Friday. I don't consider 5 days ASAP and am expecting several important emails regarding a home purchase I'm in the middle of.
Jessica H: Okay. I completely understand. The maintenance that the server that your account is on was not expected to take this long.
Jessica H: Right now the technicians are working around the clock to resolve this issue.
Shelley : What alternative exists? Is there a way to have mail forwarded to an alternate account?
Shelley : I've never experienced an outage like this, particularly with a service I'm paying for.
Jessica H: Not at this time. All of the mail will be present once the server is back up and running.
Jessica H: I wish that I had more information to tell you but all we know is that it should be up and running soon.
Shelley : I'm seriously questioning the value at this point, and its the first time I've ever been dissapointed by apple, but its a critical situation
Shelley : But how is "soon" defined by Apple?
Jessica H: I completely understand where you are coming from. The server is still undergoing maintenance. It could be an moment, or hour that it will be fixed.
Jessica H: We just don't have an ETA as of yet. I do apologize.
Shelley : Is that what customers have been told since Friday? A moment or hour? Because clearly that has not been accurate
Shelley : Is there an address I can use to send a formal complaint? I just don't feel like customers are being treated very well through this transition. One free month of MobileMe doesn't do me much good when I cannot access it.
Jessica H: I have a link that I can provide to you so that you can submit your comments about this situation if you would like.
Jessica H: http://www.apple.com/feedback/mac/tm.html
Shelley : I'd prefer a mailing address.
Jessica H: well, I can see if we can escalate your case.
Jessica H: You would be emailed then,
Shelley : But I can't receive email?
Jessica H: At this time. No.
Jessica H: It would be sent to an alternate email address.
Shelley : Maybe I don't understand what you are saying..what would I be emailed about?
Jessica H: I can see if we can escalate this request if you wouldn't mind waiting for a moment.
Jessica H: AS seeing that you were wanting to make a formal complaint
Jessica H: I can have a specialist contact you since we do not have an phone number or mailing address for a formal complaint.
Shelley : I have a hard time believing there is no address for a formal complaint, but go ahead and have a specialist contact me. I don't really understand what the specialist will do for me that isn't already being done.
Jessica H: I thought that would at least be an alternative since we do not have a means to provide to you for a formal complaint.
Jessica H: I submitted the request. It could take a few moments to see what can be done.
Shelley : Thank you.
Jessica H: Thank you for waiting. I'll be with you in just a moment.
Jessica H: I'll be right with you.
Jessica H: Okay
Jessica H: I have the corporate address link so that you can make a formal complaint
Jessica H: http://www.apple.com/contact/
Shelley : OK thank you.
Jessica H: You are welcome
Jessica H: Sorry that took a bit
Jessica H: I had to locate it for you.
Shelley : ok
Jessica H: That would be the link that you would use to make a formal complaint.
Jessica H: I am sorry for all of this.
Jessica H: I just wish that there was something more that we could do for you at this time.
Jessica H: Is there anything else I can assist you with?
Shelley : Me too.
Shelley : No
Jessica H: Okay. Despite the circumstances, I hope that you have a great day!
Jessica H: Please click the blue "Close" button at top left to answer a few questions about the assistance I provided during this chat, you will also have the option to request a copy of the transcript be emailed to you.
Shelley : ok
Transcript below..but bottom line...if you write me at my mac.com address normally...update your address books...write me at the same screen name on aol.com instead.
essica H: Hello Shelley. Thank you for your patience while waiting. What MobileMe billing, mail, or syncing issue can I assist you with today?
Shelley : I've not received any mail on my mobile mail account since last Friday. I would like to know when this issue is going to be resolved since the web site as said "ASAP" since Friday. I don't consider 5 days ASAP and am expecting several important emails regarding a home purchase I'm in the middle of.
Jessica H: Okay. I completely understand. The maintenance that the server that your account is on was not expected to take this long.
Jessica H: Right now the technicians are working around the clock to resolve this issue.
Shelley : What alternative exists? Is there a way to have mail forwarded to an alternate account?
Shelley : I've never experienced an outage like this, particularly with a service I'm paying for.
Jessica H: Not at this time. All of the mail will be present once the server is back up and running.
Jessica H: I wish that I had more information to tell you but all we know is that it should be up and running soon.
Shelley : I'm seriously questioning the value at this point, and its the first time I've ever been dissapointed by apple, but its a critical situation
Shelley : But how is "soon" defined by Apple?
Jessica H: I completely understand where you are coming from. The server is still undergoing maintenance. It could be an moment, or hour that it will be fixed.
Jessica H: We just don't have an ETA as of yet. I do apologize.
Shelley : Is that what customers have been told since Friday? A moment or hour? Because clearly that has not been accurate
Shelley : Is there an address I can use to send a formal complaint? I just don't feel like customers are being treated very well through this transition. One free month of MobileMe doesn't do me much good when I cannot access it.
Jessica H: I have a link that I can provide to you so that you can submit your comments about this situation if you would like.
Jessica H: http://www.apple.com/feedback/mac/tm.html
Shelley : I'd prefer a mailing address.
Jessica H: well, I can see if we can escalate your case.
Jessica H: You would be emailed then,
Shelley : But I can't receive email?
Jessica H: At this time. No.
Jessica H: It would be sent to an alternate email address.
Shelley : Maybe I don't understand what you are saying..what would I be emailed about?
Jessica H: I can see if we can escalate this request if you wouldn't mind waiting for a moment.
Jessica H: AS seeing that you were wanting to make a formal complaint
Jessica H: I can have a specialist contact you since we do not have an phone number or mailing address for a formal complaint.
Shelley : I have a hard time believing there is no address for a formal complaint, but go ahead and have a specialist contact me. I don't really understand what the specialist will do for me that isn't already being done.
Jessica H: I thought that would at least be an alternative since we do not have a means to provide to you for a formal complaint.
Jessica H: I submitted the request. It could take a few moments to see what can be done.
Shelley : Thank you.
Jessica H: Thank you for waiting. I'll be with you in just a moment.
Jessica H: I'll be right with you.
Jessica H: Okay
Jessica H: I have the corporate address link so that you can make a formal complaint
Jessica H: http://www.apple.com/contact/
Shelley : OK thank you.
Jessica H: You are welcome
Jessica H: Sorry that took a bit
Jessica H: I had to locate it for you.
Shelley : ok
Jessica H: That would be the link that you would use to make a formal complaint.
Jessica H: I am sorry for all of this.
Jessica H: I just wish that there was something more that we could do for you at this time.
Jessica H: Is there anything else I can assist you with?
Shelley : Me too.
Shelley : No
Jessica H: Okay. Despite the circumstances, I hope that you have a great day!
Jessica H: Please click the blue "Close" button at top left to answer a few questions about the assistance I provided during this chat, you will also have the option to request a copy of the transcript be emailed to you.
Shelley : ok
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